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I Shouldn't Even Be Doing This!: And Other Things That Strike Me as Funny
by Bob NewhartThe first book ever from an icon of American comedy--a hilarious combination of stories from his career and observations about lifeThat stammer. Those basset-hound eyes. That bone-dry wit. There has never been another comedian like Bob Newhart. His comedy albums, movies, and two hit television series have made him a national treasure and placed him firmly in the pantheon of comedy legends. Who else has a drinking game named after him And now, at last, Newhart puts his brilliant and hysterical world view on paper.Never a punch-line comic, always more of a storyteller, he tells anecdotes from throughout his life and career, including his beginnings as an accountant and the groundbreaking success of his comedy albums and The Bob Newhart Show and Newhart, which gave him fifteen years on primetime television. And he also gives his wry, comedic twist to a multitude of topics, including golf, drinking, and family holidays.Today, Newhart appears on Desperate Housewives, in hit movies such as Elf, and in theaters around the country. Reruns of his shows air constantly on Nick at Nite--have recently been released with great success for the first time ever on DVD. With this book, Bob Newhart gives his millions of fans a first ever opportunity to sample his unique brand of humor--including excerpts from some of his classic routines--on the printed page.
I Shouldn't Even Be Doing This!: And Other Things That Strike Me as Funny
by Bob NewhartThe first book ever from an icon of American comedy -- a hilarious combination of stories from his career and observations about life That stammer. Those basset-hound eyes. That bone-dry wit. There has never been another comedian like Bob Newhart. His comedy albums, movies, and two hit television series have made him a national treasure and placed him firmly in the pantheon of comedy legends. Who else has a drinking game named after him And now, at last, Newhart puts his brilliant and hysterical world view on paper. Never a punch-line comic, always more of a storyteller, he tells anecdotes from throughout his life and career, including his beginnings as an accountant and the groundbreaking success of his comedy albums and The Bob Newhart Show and Newhart, which gave him fifteen years on primetime television. And he also gives his wry, comedic twist to a multitude of topics, including golf, drinking, and family holidays. Today, Newhart appears on Desperate Housewives, in hit movies such as Elf, and in theaters around the country. Reruns of his shows air constantly on Nick at Nite -- have recently been released with great success for the first time ever on DVD. With this book, Bob Newhart gives his millions of fans a first ever opportunity to sample his unique brand of humor -- including excerpts from some of his classic routines -- on the printed page.
In the Woods: Dublin Murder Squad: 1. Winner of the Edgar, Anthony, Barry, Macavity and the IVCA Clarion awards (Dublin Murder Squad #Bk. 1)
by Tana FrenchWhen he was twelve years old, Adam Ryan went playing in the woods with his two best friends. He never saw them again. Their bodies were never found, and Adam himself was discovered with his back pressed against an oak tree and his shoes filled with blood. He had no memory of what had happened. Twenty years on, Rob Ryan - the child who came back - is a detective in the Dublin police force. He's changed his name. No one knows about his past. Then a little girl's body is found at the site of the old tragedy and Rob is drawn back into the mystery. Knowing that he would be thrown off the case if his past were revealed, Rob takes a fateful decision to keep quiet but hope that he might also solve the twenty-year-old mystery of the woods.
Incarceron (Incarceron Ser.)
by Catherine FisherIncarceron - a futuristic prison, sealed from view, where the descendants of the original prisoners live in a dark world torn by rivalry and savagery. It is a terrifying mix of high technology - a living building which pervades the novel as an ever-watchful, ever-vengeful character, and a typical medieval torture chamber - chains, great halls, dungeons. A young prisoner, Finn, has haunting visions of an earlier life, and cannot believe he was born here and has always been here. In the outer world, Claudia, daughter of the Warden of Incarceron, is trapped in her own form of prison - a futuristic world constructed beautifully to look like a past era, an imminent marriage she dreads. She knows nothing of Incarceron, except that it exists. But there comes a moment when Finn, inside Incarceron, and Claudia, outside, simultaneously find a device - a crystal key, through which they can talk to each other. And so the plan for Finn's escape is born ... 'I loved the book. It's a crazy, cool, dark world ... it's a great story.' -- Taylor Lautner, star of the Twilight movies
The Islamist: Why I Joined Radical Islam In Britain, What I Saw Inside And Why I Left
by Ed HusainWhen I was sixteen I became an Islamic fundamentalist. Five years later, after much emotional turmoil, I rejected fundamentalist teachings and returned to normal life and my family. I tried to put my experiences behind me, but as the events of 7/7 unfolded it became clear to me that Islamist groups pose a threat to this country that we - Muslims and non-Muslims alike - do not yet understand. Why are young British Muslims becoming extremists? What are the risks of another home-grown terrorist attack on British soil? By describing my experiences inside these groups, the reasons I joined them and how, after leaving I recovered my faith and mind, I hope to explain the appeal of extremist thought, how fanatics penetrate Muslim communities and the truth behind their agenda of subverting the West and moderate Islam. Writing candidly about life after extremism, I illustrate the depth of the problem that now grips Muslim hearts and minds. I will lay bare what politicians and Muslim 'community leaders' do not want you to know. This is the first time an ex-member openly discusses life within radical Islamic organisations. This is my story.
Journey to the Centre of the Earth: Reader (Classics With Ruskin Ser. #Vol. 4)
by Jules VerneAfter decoding a scrap of paper in runic script, the intrepid Professor Lidenbrock and his nervous nephew Axel travel across Iceland to find the secret passage to the centre of the earth. Enlisting the silent Hans as a guide, the trio encounter a perilous and astonishing subterranean world of natural hazards, curious sights, prehistoric beasts and sea monsters.
The Kayla Chronicles
by Sherri WinstonKayla Dean, junior feminist and future journalist, is about the break the story of a lifetime. She is auditioning for the Lady Lions dance team to prove they discriminate against the not-so-well endowed. But when she makes the team, her best friend and fellow feminist, Rosalie, is not happy.Now a Lady Lion, Kayla is transformed from bushy-haired fashion victim to glammed-up dance diva. But does looking good and having fun mean turning her back on the cause? Can you be a strong woman and still wear really cute shoes? Soon Kayla is forced to challenge her views, coming to terms with who she is and what girl power really means.Narrated with sharp language and just the right amount of attitude, The Kayla Chronicles is the story of a girl's struggle for self-identity despite pressure from family, friends and her own conscience. Kayla's story is snappy, fun and inspiring, sure to appeal to anyone who's every questioned who they really are.
Kindness Goes Unpunished: The exciting third book in the best-selling, award-winning series - now a hit Netflix show! (A Walt Longmire Mystery #3)
by Craig JohnsonThe third book in the New York Times bestselling Longmire series, featuring Sheriff Walt Longmire.Walt Longmire has been the Sheriff in Wyoming's Absaroka County for 25 years, but nothing could have prepared him for the savage attack on his daughter, Cady, a Philadelphia lawyer who has unwittingly become embroiled in a political cover-up.As Walt and his best friend, Henry Standing Bear, scour the city for clues, he gets help from his deputy Victoria Moretti and her family of Philly police. But Longmire wasn't born yesterday. He's willing to pull out all the stops to find Cady's attacker and show the big city that this old-timer has a few moves left in his saddlebag of tricks.'Johnson's pacing is tight and his dialogue snaps' Entertainment Weekly
A Life Decoded: My Genome: My Life
by J. Craig VenterCraig Venter is no ordinary scientist, and no ordinary man. He is the first human being ever to read their own DNA – and see the key to life itself. Yet in doing so, he rocked the establishment and became embroiled in one of the biggest controversies of our age.This is the story of his incredible life: from teenage rebel and Vietnam medic, to daredevil sailor and maverick researcher, whose race to unravel the sequence of the human genome made him both hero and pariah. Incorporating his own genetic make-up into his story, this is an electrifying portrait of a man who pushed back the boundaries of the possible.
Lives of the Planets: A Natural History of the Solar System
by Richard CorfieldLives of the Planets describes a scientific field in the midst of a revolution. Planetary science has mainly been a descriptive science, but it is becoming increasingly experimental. The space probes that went up between the 1960s and 1990s were primarily generalists-they collected massive amounts of information so that scientists could learn what questions to pursue. But recent missions have become more focused: Scientists know better what information they want and how to collect it. Even now probes are on their way to Mercury, Venus, Mars, and Pluto, with Europa-one of Jupiter's moons-on the agenda. In a sweeping look into the manifold objects inhabiting the depths of space, Lives of the Planets delves into the mythology and the knowledge humanity has built over the ages. Placing our current understanding in historical context, Richard Corfield explores the seismic shifts in planetary astronomy and probes why we must change our perspective of our place in the universe. In our era of extraordinary discovery, this is the first comprehensive survey of this new understanding and the history of how we got here.
Loads More Lies to tell Small Kids
by Andy RileyIt takes the beaks of seven penguins to make a Penguin biscuit'; 'All wind is made by wind farms'; 'Wine makes mummy clever'; 'Milk feels pain'. These are just some of the great lies that Andy Riley had you telling your kids last Christmas, in the Sunday Times bestseller GREAT LIES TO TELL SMALL KIDS. Now here are LOADS MORE LIES, to bamboozle more kids and entertain wicked adults everywhere... A brilliant sequel to the Sunday Times Top Ten bestseller.
The Lost Estate (Popular Penguins Series)
by Adam Gopnik Henri Alain-Fournier Robin BussWhen Meaulnes first arrives at the local school in Sologne, everyone is captivated by his good looks, daring and charisma. But when Meaulnes disappears for several days, and returns with tales of a strange party at a mysterious house and a beautiful girl hidden within it, he has been changed forever. In his restless search for his Lost Estate and the happiness he found there, Meaulnes, observed by his loyal friend Francois, may risk losing everything he ever had. Poised between youthful admiration and adult resignation, Alain-Fournier’s compelling narrator carries the reader through this evocative and unbearably poignant portrayal of desperate friendship and vanished adolescence.
Magic Bites: A Kate Daniels Novel: 1 (Kate Daniels Novel Ser. #1)
by Ilona AndrewsKate Daniels is about to enter a world of gritty magic and dangerous mystery! Vampires, necromancers and mages abound on the city streets, with one kickass heroine in the middleFuture Atlanta is an interesting place to live: one moment magic dominates, and cars stall and guns fail. The next, technology takes over and the defensive spells no longer protect your house from monsters.Here skyscrapers topple under the onslaught of magic; the Pack, a paramilitary clan of shapechangers, prowl through the ruined streets; and the Masters of the Dead, necromancers driven by their thirst for knowledge and wealth, pilot blood-crazed vampires with their minds. Kate Daniels likes her sword a little too much, and she has a hard time controlling her mouth. The magic in her blood makes her a target, and she's spent most of her life hiding in plain sight. But when Kate's guardian is murdered, she must choose to do nothing, and remain safe, or to risk her life by pursuing his preternatural killer. Hiding is easy, but the right choice is rarely easy ...Readers are hooked on Magic Bites:'Everything in this story has an edge to it . . . there is humour, but it's of the drier, more wry, and grimmer variety . . . The stakes are particularly high in this novel, in ways that you need to read to find out' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐'[Kate] is tough, smart, mouthy and a little arrogant. She is my favourite kind of heroine. She doesn't give in to lengthy emotional blabbering or emotional breakdowns so I love her!' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐'I want to add a gazillion more starts to my rating . . . I love the concept of the shifting magic and technology' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐'Kate is a kickass heroine. She knows how to use her sword better than she knows how to walk in high heels. She is fierce, strong, reliable, faithful to her friends' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ 'I love this book. I love this world. I love Kate. It's still my favourite series. It's fantastic, it's a great start, and if you haven't read it yet, DO IT. And then remember that the books just get better from here, exponentially better' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐
The Man with the Golden Torc: Secret History Book 1 (Secret History #1)
by Simon GreenMeet a new kind of hero in an old kind of war: Eddie Drood, aka Shaman Bond. He protects humanity from the bad guys.All those things you hear about as a kid? The boogeyman under the bed? The creature in the closet? They're for real, and Eddie Drood's family has kept humanity safe from the things that go bump in the night for centuries. They hold back the nightmares, lock the doors, bar the gates, and put righteous boot to monster arse on a nightly basis. But now Eddie's in trouble. One of his own has convinced the rest of the family that humanity needs to be protected from him. So he's on the run, using every trick in the book, magical and otherwise, to live long enough to prove his innocence. He knows how dangerous the Droods can be - after all, he's one of themThe Man with the Golden Torc is the first book in the Secret History series From the New York Times bestselling author of the Deathstalker and Nightside series, Simon R. Green.
The Marsh Arabs
by Wilfred Thesiger Jon Lee AndersonDuring the years he spent among the Marsh Arabs of southern Iraq Wilfred Thesiger came to understand, admire and share a way of life that had endured for many centuries. Travelling from village to village by canoe, he won acceptance by dispensing medicines and treating the sick. In this account of his time there he pays tribute to the hospitality, loyalty, courage and endurance of the people, describes their impressive reed houses, the waterways and lakes teeming with wildlife, the herding of buffalo and hunting of wild boar, moments of tragedy and moments of pure comedy, all in vivid, engaging detail.Untouched by the modern world until recently, these independent people, their way of life and their surroundings have suffered widespread destruction under the regime of Saddam Hussein. Wilfred Thesiger's magnificent account of his time spent among them is a moving testament to their now threatened culture and the landscape they inhabit.
Meatball Sundae: How new marketing is transforming the business world (and how to thrive in it)
by Seth GodinWhat is a meatball sundae? It's something messy, disgusting and ineffective, the result of combining two perfectly good things that don't go together. Meatballs are the basic staples, the things people need, the stuff that used to be marketed quite well with TV and other mass market techniques. The topping is new marketing: MySpace, websites, YouTube, and all of the magic that CEOs wish would shine atop their companies. The problem? New marketing is lousy at selling meatballs. When confronted with the myriad opportunities presented by new marketing, people usually ask 'How can we make this stuff work for us?' This, as Seth Godin explains in his remarkable new book, is exactly the wrong question. Mapping out 14 trends that are completely remaking what it means to be a marketer - and by extension transforming what we make and how we make it - Godin shows how the question for any thriving 21st century business must be: 'How can we alter our business to become an organization that thrives on new marketing?' Meatball Sundae is an essential guide to the fundamental shift taking place in the marketing and business world, and shows you how to align your business to it.
Money for Nothing (Everyman's Library P G Wodehouse Ser. #52)
by P. G. WodehouseA P.G. Wodehouse novelThe peaceful slumber of the Worcester village of Rudge-in-the-Vale is about to be rudely disrupted. First there's a bitter feud between peppery Colonel Wyvern and the Squire of Rudge Hall, rich but miserly Lester Carmody. Second, that arch-villain Chimp Twist has opened a health farm - and he and Soapy and Dolly Molloy are planning a fake burglary so Lester can diddle his insurance company. After the knockout drops are served, things get a little complicated. But will Lester's nephew John win over his true love, Colonel Wyvern's daughter Pat, and restore tranquillity to the idyll? It's a close-run thing...
Mr Impossible: Number 2 in series (Carsington Quartet #2)
by Loretta ChaseRupert Carsington, fourth son of the Earl of Hargate, is his aristocratic family's favorite disaster. He is irresistibly handsome, shockingly masculine, and irretrievably reckless, and wherever he goes, trouble follows. Still, Rupert's never met an entanglement - emotional or other - he couldn't escape. Only now he's in Egypt, stranded in the depths of Cairo's most infamous prison, and his only way out is accepting a beautiful widow's dangerous proposal. Scholar Daphne Pembroke wants him to rescue her brother, who's been kidnapped by a rival seeking a fabled treasure. Their partnership is strictly business: She'll provide the brains, he, the brawn. Simple enough in theory.But as tensions flare and inhibitions melt, the most disciplined of women and the most reckless of men are about to clash in the most impossibly irresistible way.
Murder in Amsterdam: Liberal Europe, Islam, And The Limits Of Tolerance
by Ian BurumaIt was an emblematic crime: on a November day in Amsterdam, an angry young Muslim man shot and killed the Dutch filmmaker Theo van Gogh, iconic European provocateur, for making a movie with the anti-Islam politician Ayaan Hersi Ali. After shooting van Gogh, Mohammed Bouyeri calmly stood over the body and cut his throat with a curved machete. The murder horrified quiet, complacent Holland - a country that prides itself on being a bastion of tolerance - and sent shock waves around the world. In Murder in Amsterdam, Ian Buruma describes what he found when he returned to his native country to try and make sense of van Gogh's death. The result is Buruma's masterpiece: a brave and rigorous study of conflict in our time, with the intimacy and control of a true-crime page-turner.
Nada: Premio Nadal 1944 (Ldp Bibl Romans Ser. #Vol. 6)
by Carmen LaforetEighteen-year old Andrea moves to Barcelona to stay with relatives she has not seen in years while she pursues her dreams of studying at university. Arriving in the dead of night she discovers not the independence she craves, but a crumbling apartment and an eccentric collection of misfits whose psychological ruin and violent behaviour echoes that of the recent civil war.As the tension between the family members grows in claustrophobic intensity, Andrea finds comfort in a friendship with Ena, a girl from university whose guilded life only serves to highlight the squalor of Andrea's own experiences. But what is the secret of the relationship between between Ena and Andrea's predatory uncle Roman, and what future can lie ahead for Andrea in such a bizarre and disturbing world?Translated by Edith Grossman
The Name of the Wind: The legendary must-read fantasy masterpiece (Kingkiller Chronicle #Bk. 1)
by Patrick RothfussThe lyrical fantasy masterpiece about stories, legends and how they change the world. The Name of the Wind is an absolute must-read for any fan of fantasy fiction.'This is a magnificent book' Anne McCaffrey'I was reminded of Ursula K. Le Guin, George R. R. Martin, and J. R. R. Tolkein, but never felt that Rothfuss was imitating anyone' THE TIMES'I have stolen princesses back from sleeping barrow kings. I burned down the town of Trebon. I have spent the night with Felurian and left with both my sanity and my life. I was expelled from the University at a younger age than most people are allowed in. I tread paths by moonlight that others fear to speak of during day. I have talked to Gods, loved women, and written songs that make the minstrels weep.My name is Kvothe.You may have heard of me'So begins the tale of Kvothe - currently known as Kote, the unassuming innkeepter - from his childhood in a troupe of traveling players, through his years spent as a near-feral orphan in a crime-riddled city, to his daringly brazen yet successful bid to enter a difficult and dangerous school of magic. In these pages you will come to know Kvothe the notorious magician, the accomplished thief, the masterful musician, the dragon-slayer, the legend-hunter, the lover, the thief and the infamous assassin.The Name of the Wind is fantasy at its very best, and an astounding must-read coming-of-age adventure.Readers adore The Name of the Wind:'The quality of the writing breathes magic into even fairly ordinary scenes, and makes some of the important ones extraordinary' Mark Lawrence'This is why I love fantasy so much . . . The writing style is smooth, the pacing just right . . . I would easily recommend this to anyone who enjoys fantasy, but also to people who enjoy great stories told wonderfully well' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐'For the love of God, if you haven't read this book and love these kinds of high fantasy novels, READ IT!' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐'The story is fantastic, the writing is amazing, and if you have a heart the main character will capture it' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐'Patrick Rothfuss is such a talented storyteller and there was never a dull moment throughout the entire book! . . . The Name of the Wind is a masterpiece and Patrick Rothfuss is a freaking genius' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐'This story was, simply put, excellent . . . Rothfuss has more than earnt his reputation. I'm so glad this book lived up to the hype . . . A jaw dropping five stars' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐'One of the best fantasy books of all time' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐'A legitimately wonderful story that is written beautifully . . . This should be one of the required reading books for any fan of fantasy' Goodreads reviewer, ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐
The New Industrial State
by John Kenneth Galbraith Sean Wilentz James K. GalbraithWith searing wit and incisive commentary, John Kenneth Galbraith redefined America's perception of itself in The New Industrial State, one of his landmark works. The United States is no longer a free-enterprise society, Galbraith argues, but a structured state controlled by the largest companies. Advertising is the means by which these companies manage demand and create consumer "need" where none previously existed. Multinational corporations are the continuation of this power system on an international level. The goal of these companies is not the betterment of society, but immortality through an uninterrupted stream of earnings. First published in 1967, The New Industrial State continues to resonate today.
The New Policeman (The New Policeman Trilogy #1)
by Kate ThompsonEveryone in Kinvara is conscious that time is flying past, faster and faster - to such an extent that when JJ asks his mother what she would like as a birthday present she ask for more time. JJ dismisses this as mere wishful thinking, an impossibility, for who know where the time goes? The Liddys have been musicians for generations and JJ is no exception but what he discovers is that a shadow from the past hangs over their family -did his great-grandfather murder the village priest? When he sets out to buy his mother time, he discovers the fate of a flute which will provide the key to both problems - it is the vital clue. He makes the transition to Tir na n'Og, the land of eternal youth, where the fairy people are also having a problem with time and it falls to his lot to locate the leak between the two parallel worlds. JJ finds where time goes!Music proves to be the touchstone for communication between the fairy and the human domains and the book is saturated with the lure of Irish music for JJ`s whole existence is built round the ceili and each chapter relates to a tune, printed out as a heading so that the reader can also become a performer. As for the New Policeman, Larry O'Dwyer, he is an enigmatic figure who has a significant bearing on the plot but whose identity is kept a superbly guarded secret to the very last surprising moment.
Night Watch: Audible Format (Modern Plays #29)
by Terry PratchettA new stage adaptation of one of Pratchett's best-selling novelsSet in Ankh-Morpork one of the most thoroughly imagined cities in fantasy, Night Watch is the story of Sam Vimes, running hero of the Guards sequence, who finds himself cast back in time to the Ankh-Morpork of his youth. With a psychopath from his own time rising in the vile ranks of the Cable Street Unmentionables complicating things, Vimes has to ensure that history takes its course so that he will have the right future to go back to, and to keep his younger self alive."One of the funniest English authors alive" (Independent)
No! I Don't Want to Join a Bookclub: Diary Of A Sixtieth Year
by Virginia IronsideToo young to get whisked away by a Stannah Stairlift, or to enjoy the luxury of a walk-in bath (but not so much that she doesn't enjoy comfortable shoes), Marie is all the same getting on in years - and she's thrilled about it. She's a bit preoccupied about whether to give up sex - Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! - but there are compensations, like falling in love with her baby grandson, and maybe falling in love with someone else too? Curmudgeonly, acute, touching and funny, this diary is what happens when grumply old women meet Bridget Jones.