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The Shitshow: An ‘Is It Just Me Or Is Everything Shit?’ Special
by Steve Lowe Alan McArthurSo, it turns out things can get even shitter. Who knew? Er, we did, sadly. Still: you have to laugh. You, like, have to. So let's!Featuring: Oh, Jeremy Corbyn; Danny Dyer turning out to be good; Fortnite; Hipster pies; The Independent Group; Reviews for items on supermarket delivery sites; Even Mark Zuckerburg saying the Internet needs regulating; New football stadiums; Old football stadiums; Feeling a bit sorry for Theresa May; Elon Musk;Christopher Nolan films that aren't Memento; TED Talks; Irish passports - this year's must-have accessory!; Airbnb obsessives; Woke one-upmanship; Vladimir Putin; How many f*cking platforms am I supposed to have to pay for just to watch the f*cking telly?
Shmelf the Hanukkah Elf
by Greg Wolfe Howard McWilliamIn this delightfully inventive holiday tale, an elf named Shmelf takes a journey from the North Pole . . . and discovers all the joys of Hanukkah.Shmelf is one of Santa's most important elves. He's part of the List Checking department, and he makes sure all the good boys and girls get their presents! But when Shmelf finds out that some children are missing from Santa's list, he goes to investigate.What Shmelf uncovers is Hanukkah, a wondrous and joyful holiday that Jewish families celebrate each year. As Shmelf observes a family lighting the menorah, playing dreidel, and hearing the Hanukkah story, he sees how special the traditions of the holiday truly are--and he wants to be a part of it! Luckily, Santa just might have a special role in mind for Shmelf . . .The rich traditions of Hanukkah come to life in this whimsical and magical story that's perfect for the holiday season.
Shmelf the Hanukkah Elf
by Greg Wolfe Howard McWilliamIn this delightfully inventive holiday tale, an elf named Shmelf takes a journey from the North Pole . . . and discovers all the joys of Hanukkah.Shmelf is one of Santa's most important elves. He's part of the List Checking department, and he makes sure all the good boys and girls get their presents! But when Shmelf finds out that some children are missing from Santa's list, he goes to investigate.What Shmelf uncovers is Hanukkah, a wondrous and joyful holiday that Jewish families celebrate each year. As Shmelf observes a family lighting the menorah, playing dreidel, and hearing the Hanukkah story, he sees how special the traditions of the holiday truly are--and he wants to be a part of it! Luckily, Santa just might have a special role in mind for Shmelf . . .The rich traditions of Hanukkah come to life in this whimsical and magical story that's perfect for the holiday season.
A Shock: Shortlisted for the James Tait Black Prize for Fiction
by Keith Ridgway'A Shock inhabits the secret life of a city, its hidden energies. It dramatizes how patterns form and then disperse, how stories are made and relationships created . . . remarkable' - Colm Tóibín, author of Brooklyn 'Political, pertinent, spunky and funny, A Shock is a grand sweep of modern storytelling' - June Caldwell, author of Room Little Darker In A Shock, a clutch of more or less loosely connected characters appear, disappear and reappear. They are all of them on the fringes of London life, often clinging on – to sanity or solvency or a story – by their fingertips.Keith Ridgway, author of the acclaimed Hawthorn & Child, writes about people whose understanding of their own situation is only ever partial and fuzzy, who are consumed by emotions and anxieties and narratives, or the lack thereof, that they cannot master. He focuses on peripheral figures who mean well and to whom things happen, and happen confusingly, and his fictional strategies reflect this focus. In a deftly conjured high-wire act, Ridgway achieves the fine balance between the imperatives of drama and fidelity to his characters. The result is pin-sharp and often breathtaking.'A Shock is a perfect, living circle of beauty and mystery, clearsighted and compassionate, and, at times, wonderfully funny’ - David Hayden, author of Darker With the Lights On
Shoe Addicts Anonymous (Laugh Lines Ser.)
by Beth HarbisonFour very different women...all addicted to shoes. Lorna is up to her eyeballs in debt but can't help bidding for the newest Jimmy Choos on eBay. Helene is unhappily married to a politician who keeps threatening to cancel her credit cards. Sandra pays her shoe bills by working as a phone sex operator. And Joss is a nanny who has found herself in a family from hell and will do just about anything to get out of the house on her night off.When they come upon a classified advert, inviting shoe lovers to a weekly shoe-swap, each one jumps at the chance to meet fellow addicts. But none of them realise that they will come away with much, much more than just a new pair of kitten heels...
Shoes, Chocs, Bags and Frocks
by Edward MonktonSometimes all a woman needs is a great pair of shoes – sometimes chocolate is the swiftest route to happiness. In this beautifully produced collection of drawings specifically for women, Edward Monkton brings together some of his best-known musings in his own quirky and inimitable style. It’s the perfect gift for mothers and for women of all ages.
The Shoes of Salvation
by Edward MonktonA gorgeous hand-lettered poem by Edward Monkton, this is a beautiful duet between a shoe and an admiring lady.
Shoo!
by Michael RosenA funny farmyard story from much-loved author, Michael Rosen. Perfect for bedtime, or any time!
Shoot the Puppy: A Survival Guide to the Curious Jargon of Modern Life
by Tony ThorneAre you a bobo or a wombat? Are you tempted by infobia or to kick dead whales up the beach? If your answer to any of these questions is 'What are you talking about?', then you definitely need a copy of Shoot the Puppy. Amusing, informative and newly updated for 2007, it guides the reader through the ever-growing heap of contemporary jargon from around the English-speaking world, showing where it comes from, what it means, and what it tells us about our contemporary world.
Shooting Martha
by David Thewlis'A riotously good novel, witty and earnest, brimming with sharply drawn characters and creeping suspense. David Thewlis is a fabulous writer' Anna Bailey, Sunday Times bestselling author of Tall BonesCelebrated director Jack Drake can't get through his latest film (his most personal yet) without his wife Martha's support. The only problem is, she's dead...When Jack sees Betty Dean - actress, mother, trainwreck - playing the part of a crazed nun on stage in an indie production of The Devils, he is struck dumb by her resemblance to Martha. Desperate to find a way to complete his masterpiece, he hires her to go and stay in his house in France and resuscitate Martha in the role of 'loving spouse'.But as Betty spends her days roaming the large, sunlit rooms of Jack's mansion - filled to the brim with odd treasures and the occasional crucifix - and her evenings playing the part of Martha over scripted video calls with Jack, she finds her method acting taking her to increasingly dark places. And as Martha comes back to life, she carries with her the truth about her suicide - and the secret she guarded until the end.A darkly funny novel set between a London film set and a villa in the south of France.A mix of Vertigo and Jonathan Coe, written by a master storyteller.PRAISE FOR DAVID THEWLIS'S FICTION 'David Thewlis has written an extraordinarily good novel, which is not only brilliant in its own right, but stands proudly beside his work as an actor, no mean boast' Billy Connolly'Hilarious and horror-filled' Francesca Segal, Observer'A fine study in character disintegration... Very funny' David Baddiel, The Times'Exquisitely written with a warm heart and a wry wit... Stunning' Elle'Queasily entertaining' Financial Times'A sharp ear for dialogue and a scabrously satiric prose style' Daily Mail'Laugh-out-loud, darkly intelligent' Publishers Weekly'This is far more than an actor's vanity project: Thewlis has talent' Kirkus
Shooting's Strangest Days
by Tom QuinnMad old colonels who took their trousers off before going elephant hunting, women poachers with terriers sewn into their underskirts, duck shooters chasing their quarry in helicopters – here they all in their vast and until now, long forgotten, eccentricity. Shooting's Strangest Days is a unique collection of stories about the mad, the bad and the truly dangerous to know from more than two hundred years of sporting shooting. Covering everything from delightfully dotty Royals – like George V, who always went shooting with a gun loader deliberately chosen because he looked exactly like the king – to obscure French chamois hunters, South American crocodile stranglers, Russian secret service beaters and suicidal Himalayan goat guides.
The Shop of Impossible Ice Creams: Book 1 (The Shop of Impossible Ice Creams #1)
by Shane HegartyWelcome to the Shop of Impossible Ice Creams! Step inside to discover a delicious world of magical adventure, from bestselling author Shane Hegarty. First in a comic, heart-warming illustrated series, for 7+ fans of The Nothing to See Here Hotel and Charlie Changes into a Chicken. Limpet's mum is opening an ice-cream shop, full of her favourite new flavours: mushroom and tuna ice cream, anyone? Roast parsnip and gravy? Limpet's not sure about this. He likes a nice, safe life. His favourite ice-cream flavour is vanilla.But when wicked Mr Fluffy arrives with his Mega Emporium of Amazing and Spectacular Ice Creams, Limpet knows he's got to fight back. And there are magic ingredients on his doorstep which can solve all his worries, if only he can get the recipe just right ... Illustrated throughout with fabulous black and white illustrations by Jeff Crowther and written by the bestselling author of Boot, this story will make you fall in love with reading.
The Shop of Impossible Ice Creams: Book 2 (The Shop of Impossible Ice Creams #2)
by Shane HegartyOne of the funniest books you'll read this year, perfect for fans of Roald Dahl's George's Marvellous Medicine. Welcome to the Shop of Impossible Ice Creams! Step inside to discover a delicious world of magical adventure, from bestselling author Shane Hegarty. Second in a comic, heart-warming illustrated series, for 7+ readers.Limpet and his mum run an ice-cream shop, full of her favourite flavours: spaghetti ice cream, anyone? Terrific tomato and parsnip ice cream? But his mum's off for the weekend, leaving Limpet and his dad in charge. What could possibly go wrong? When Limpet finds himself in a giant cucumber costume, defending a fairy fort against a mysterious robber, he knows that things can't possibly get any worse ... Can he catch the thief, save the ice cream shop and avoid the dastardly stink eye of Mr A Pigeon? Illustrated throughout with fabulous black and white illustrations by Jeff Crowther and written by the bestselling author of Boot, this story will make you fall in love with reading.
The Shop of Impossible Ice Creams: Book 3 (The Shop of Impossible Ice Creams #3)
by Shane HegartyOne of the funniest books you'll read this year, perfect for fans of Roald Dahl's George's Marvellous Medicine.Welcome to the Shop of Impossible Ice Creams! Step inside to discover a delicious world of magical adventure, from bestselling author Shane Hegarty. Third in a comic, heart-warming illustrated series, for 7+ readers.It's the Festival of Pirates in Splottpool, and Limpet is looking after his evil little sister, Eve, whilst his mum helps out with the festival. Mrs Cricket has also asked the kids to mind the fairy garden in the middle of the roundabout while she goes away for a week - to avoid all the piratey chaos. Trouble is brewing as they discover Mr Fluffy's super-healthy sister has opened a smoothie palace, whose healthy fruit smoothies seem to have amazingly magical effects on the customers.But not all is as it seems with the super healthy smoothies and it's up to Limpet to save the day, the shop - and even his evil little sister - if he must.Illustrated throughout with fabulous black and white illustrations by Jeff Crowther and written by the bestselling author of Boot, this story will make you fall in love with reading.
The Short End of the Sonnenallee: A Novel
by Thomas Brussig‘A kind of miracle … Not only made me laugh (again and again) but brought tears to my eyes’ Jonathan Franzen ‘One of the most brilliant satirical novels about life in East Berlin’ New York Times
A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian (Oberon Modern Plays Ser.)
by Marina LewyckaWINNER OF THE BOLLINGER EVERYMAN PRIZE FOR COMIC FICTION WINNER OF THE SAGA AWARD FOR WIT 2005SHORTLISTED FOR THE ORANGE PRIZE FOR FICTION LONGLISTED FOR THE BOOKER PRIZE 2005 'Two years after my mother died, my father fell in love with a glamorous blonde Ukrainian divorcée. He was eighty-four and she was thirty-six. She exploded into our lives like a fluffy pink grenade, churning up the murky water, bringing to the surface a sludge of sloughed-off memories, giving the family ghosts a kick up the backside.' Sisters Vera and Nadezhda must aside a lifetime of feuding to save their émigré engineer father from voluptuous gold-digger Valentina. With her proclivity for green satin underwear and boil-in-the-bag cuisine, she will stop at nothing in her pursuit of Western wealth. But the sisters' campaign to oust Valentina unearths family secrets, uncovers fifty years of Europe's darkest history and sends them back to roots they'd much rather forget . . .A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian is bestselling author Marina Lewycka's hilarious and award winning debut novel. 'It's rare to find a first novel that gets so much right . . . Lewycka is a seriously talented comic writer' Time Out 'Hugely enjoyable...yields a golden harvest of family truths' Daily Telegraph 'Delightful, funny, touching' Spectator Bestselling author Marina Lewkyca has received great critical acclaim since the publication of her hilarious first novel A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian in 2005, which was the winner of the Bollinger Everyman Prize for Comic Fiction 2005, winner of the Saga Award for Wit 2005, shortlisted for the Orange Prize for Fiction 2005 and longlisted for the Booker prize 2005. Her other humorous novels Two Caravans (published as Strawberry Fields in the USA and Canada), We Are All Made of Glue and Various Pets Alive and Dead are also available from Penguin.
Short John Silver: Book 1 (Pocket Heroes #1)
by Chris Inns Dave WoodsWhat shall we do with the shrunken sailor?Short John Silver has a map to buried treasure but no ship to sail in. So with the help of Captain Poopdeck and his motley pirate crew, he sets out to seek his fortune. But first the scurvy sailors have to brave the deadly seven seas before they can get their hooked hands on the secret hoard!A high-seas adventure with a low-stature pirate!
The Short Reign of Pippin IV: A Fabrication (Penguin Modern Classics)
by John SteinbeckSteinbeck's only work of political satire turns the French Revolution on its head, as amateur astronomer Pippin Heristal is drafted in to rule the unruly French. Enchanting comedy ensues as Steinbeck creates the most hilarious royal court ever around the brief, bold reign of the corduroy-clad Pippin, his social-climbing wife Maria, his star-struck daughter Clotilde and her Californian beau, Todd. Featuring a motley crew of courtiers and con men, guards and gardeners, Steinbeck's late comic novel is an entrancing read about politics, power and the daily struggle not to lose one's head!
A Shorter History of Tractors in Ukrainian with Handcuffs
by Marina LewyckaMarina Lewycka returns to the characters from A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian, with a hilarious erotic twist, in this laugh-out-loud short story, A Shorter History of Tractors in Ukrainian with Handcuffs.'Ever since she'd first read Sherlock Holmes, Laura Carter had dreamed of being a detective . . . Books were both her escape and her guilty pleasure, which eased her through the boring days and enlivened the nights when her husband was too tired for love. She devoured everything from Proust to Harry Potter, from James Joyce to EL James, she adored detective stories, but maybe her favourite author was Marina Lewycka, whose A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian had strangely echoed a case she had once worked on.'Marina Lewycka was born in Kiel, Germany, after the war, grew up in England and lives in Sheffield. Her first novel, A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian, was shortlisted for the Orange Prize, longlisted for the Man Booker and won the Bollinger Everyman Prize for Comic Fiction and the Waverton Good Read Award. Her second novel, Two Caravans, was shortlisted for the Orwell Prize. A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian, Two Caravans, We Are All Made of Glue and Marina's fourth novel, Various Pets Alive and Dead, are all available in Penguin.
A Shot in the Dark: A Twitten Mystery
by Lynne TrussThe charming first novel in a new comic crime series, from one of Britain's most-loved writers, the incomparable Lynne TrussBrighton, 1957. Inspector Steine rather enjoys his life as a policeman by the sea. No criminals, no crime, no stress.So it's really rather annoying when an ambitious – not to mention irritating – new constable shows up to work and starts investigating a series of burglaries. And it's even more annoying when, after Constable Twitten is despatched to the theatre for the night, he sits next to a vicious theatre critic who is promptly shot dead part way through the opening night of a new play.It seems Brighton may be in need of a police force after all…
A Shot in the Dark: A Constable Twitten Mystery (An\inspector Twitten Mystery Ser. #1)
by Lynne TrussA wryly entertaining new crime novel from Lynne Truss, New York Times bestselling author of Eats, Shoots and Leaves.It's 1957, and the famed theater critic A. S. Crystal has come to the British seaside resort of Brighton with something other than the local production of A Shilling in the Meter on his mind. Sitting in the Brighton Royal Theater with Constable Twitten, Crystal intends to tell the detective the secret he knows about the still-unsolved Aldersgate Stick-Up case of 1945. And yet, just before Crystal names the criminal mastermind involved, he's shot dead in his seat. With a new murder case on his hands and a fatuous, lazy captain at the helm of the police department, the keen and clever Constable Twitten and his colleague Sargent Jim Brunswick set out to solve the decade-old mystery of the Aldersgate Stick-Up. As the partners venture deep into the criminal underworld that lies beneath Brighton's holiday-happy veneer, they begin to discover a criminal conspiracy that dates back decades. But will Brunswick and Twitten be able to foil the mastermind, or will Crystal's death become just another unsolved crime in this seemingly peaceful seaside city? With her characteristic wit, New York Times bestselling author Lynne Truss introduces readers to a cast of eccentric policeman and scheming criminals in a drolly delightful mystery you won't want to miss.
Shot Through The Heart
by Matt CainThe Silver Screen had never shone as bright . . . Mia Sinclair is the First Lady of Love, a beautiful film goddess known across the globe for her romantic roles. But in reality life does not imitate art and love is not as easily found in the real world as it is in the movies. Leo Henderson is the Brit living in L.A, loving the lifestyle and photographing the stars - mostly when they least want to be photographed. When Mia meets Leo, the sparks fly. But is dating a paparazzi the biggest mistake of her life? And how will she cope when Leo becomes jealous of her friendship with co-star Billy Spencer, the hottest actor in town but a man hiding a secret he's worried could destroy his career?Shot through the Heart is Matt Cain's debut novel, a Hollywood tale of romance, heartbreak and the lengths some will go to maintain that unblemished movie star image.
Should Have Got Off at Sydney Parade
by Ross O'Carroll-KellyRoss O'Carroll-Kelly thought he knew all he needed to about women's bodies ... So there I was, roysh, in a state of basically very blissful ignorance, when suddenly Sorcha's up the Damien and I have to listen to, like, women's stuff. And now he's getting a biology lesson he could have SO lived without ... I am telling you, roysh, I never even knew nipples could crack and I was very happy not knowing it. I mean, all I knew about the whole scenario was six seconds of seriously good loving, and now I'm basically expected to be an expert on how to, like, breathe like Dorth Vader and deal with baby turds.Sometimes, life just isn't fair to the babe magnet supremo ... This is SO not good for my rep - but do you think Sorcha even, like, cares about that? Not focking likely!
Should I Stay Or Should I Go?: And 87 Other Serious Answers to Questions in Songs
by James BallWhat is love? How soon is now? How do you solve a problem like Maria? They're some of the most famous questions ever asked. But do you know the answer to them? In Should I Stay or Should I Go?, award-winning journalist James Ball travels from the economic status of doggies in windows, to what war is good for and what becomes of the broken hearted to find out the definitive, fascinating and hilarious answers.
Should I Tell You?: Curl up with a gorgeous romantic novel from the No. 1 bestselling author
by Jill MansellFrom the queen of feelgood fiction, an uplifting new novel of friendship, families and finding love . . .'What a gorgeous book! Jill has a great gift for characterisation - nuanced, interesting, believable people but created with a charming lightness of touch. Thanks to Jill's warmth, wisdom and emotional intelligence, this book was a huge pleasure to read' Marian Keyes 'A sparkling, joyful read! Jill's books always keep you guessing to the very end' Phillipa Ashley 'A good story like this needs a quiet afternoon, a sofa and a warm blanket. Moving and heartfelt! Enjoy' Fern BrittonAmber, Lachlan and Raffaele met as teenagers in the Cornish seaside home of kind-hearted foster parents. Years on, the bond between them is unbreakable But Amber has a secret. She's in love with Lachlan. She can't tell him, because that would never work - he's definitely not the settling-down type. Surely it's better to keep him as a friend than to risk losing him for good? Raffaele has his own dilemma. He had the dream girlfriend in Vee, until it all went horribly wrong . . . and he still can't understand why. Is Vee hiding something from him? Now their widowed foster dad Teddy has found new love. Younger, charming and beautiful, Olga seems perfect. But is she? Or will she break Teddy's fragile heart?Against a backdrop of sparkling seas and sunny skies, the unexpected is always just around the corner. Welcome to Lanrock!'With wonderful characters, this will warm you on a January day' PrimaGloriously romantic and completely life-affirming, Jill Mansell's wonderful new novel set in sunny Cornwall will make you believe in love again