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Quantum of Tweed: The Man With The Nissan Micra
by Conn IgguldenAn exclusive short story for World Book Day from one of our bestselling authors. This brilliant comic thriller will have you on the edge of your seat.
Rabid: Are You Crazy About Your Dog or Just Crazy?
by Pamela Redmond SatranDogs now dominate the $55-billion-a-year pet business in the US. Dog products, dog services, dog admiration - okay, let's call it dog worship - has become totally over the top, with doggie treadmills, dog swimming pools, caffeine-free doggie coffee, doggie massage, dog perfume, aromatherapy, hair coloring, and yes, doggie tattoos that would have seemed outlandish a generation ago when applied to your everyday household Rover.But Rover isn't called Rover anymore, he's called Rufus. Or Lola, according to the Tumblog Hipster Puppies. In fact, all Top Ten Dog Names are people names. And the canine Rufus doesn't stay home alone all day; he goes to Doggie Daycare. Eats brightly-frosted martini-shaped doggie treats. Wears designer tutus. Gets married on the beach. Has...Well, you'll see. With hilarious full-color photos throughout, Rabid holds a humorous mirror up to our dog-centered society, helping us laugh at our own behavior and at the even-more-insane antics of all those other dog people.
Rabid: Are You Crazy About Your Dog or Just Crazy?
by Pamela Redmond SatranDogs now dominate the $48 billion a year pet business, with nearly 40 percent of American households owning a total of 77.5 million dogs. Dog products, dog services, dog admiration - okay, let's call it dog worship - has become totally over the top. If you have a dog-obsessed friend or relative, you've seen the phenomenon. Or maybe you're a dog owner and lover, and have found yourself buying, doing, craving, needing dog-related items (doggie treadmills, dog swimming pools, caffeine-free doggie java) and services (doggie massage, dog perfume, aromatherapy, hair coloring, and yes, doggie tattoos) that would have seemed outlandish a generation ago when applied to your everyday household Rover.But Rover isn't called Rover anymore, he's called Rufus. Or Lola, according to the Tumblog Hipster Puppies. In fact, all Top Ten Dog Names are people names. And the canine Rufus doesn't stay home alone all day; he goes to Doggie Daycare. Eats brightly-frosted martini-shaped doggie treats. Wears designer tutus. Gets married on the beach. Has...Well, you'll see. Rabid is a catalog of how over-the-top our dog obsession had become. It's a book aimed not only at dog skeptics but at dog lovers and the people who love them. Funny, fun, yet holding a mirror up to our dog-centered society, Rabid will help us laugh at our own behavior and at the even-more-insane antics of all those other dog people. And it will give some solace to the 60 percent of us who've so far evaded America's dog mania. Photos throughout.
Raccoon Rampage: The Raid (Awesome Animals)
by Andrew CopeFrom the award-winning author of the Spy Dog series comes a wildly funny tale in HarperCollins’ Awesome Animals series – the funniest fiction, starring the wildest of wildlife from leading authors.
Raccoon Rampage - The Raid: The Raid (Awesome Animals)
by Andrew CopeFrom the award-winning author of the Spy Dog series comes a wildly funny tale in HarperCollins’ Awesome Animals series – the funniest fiction, starring the wildest of wildlife from leading authors.
Rachel's Holiday: A Hay Festival and The Poole VOTE 100 BOOKS for Women Selection
by Marian KeyesDeliciously dark and fantastically funny, Rachel's Holiday is the story of a young woman living life rather too well until the day she takes it too far endangering everything she cares about . . . 'They said I was a drug addict. But my occasional drug use was strictly recreational. And, hey, surely drug addicts are skinny?'Rachel is living it up in New York City, spending her nights talking her way into glamorous parties before heading home in the early hours to her hot boyfriend Luke.Then her sensible older sister shows up and even though it seems like a bad joke, she finds herself in actual rehab.It's there that she's supposed to kick her non-existent drug habit - and to get over losing Luke. Luke's a fox; he's also strong and kind, but he has had more than he can take of Rachel. None of this was part of her plan and saying goodbye to fun will be hard.But not as hard as losing the man that, too late, she believes might be the love of her life . . .'Gloriously funny' Sunday Times'A born storyteller' Independent on Sunday'The voice of a generation' Daily Mirror
Ratburger: The Boy In The Dress/mr Stink/billionaire Boy/gangsta Granny/ratburger
by null David WalliamsThe fifth screamingly funny novel from David Walliams, number one bestseller and fastest growing children’s author in the country. Hot on the heels of bestselling Gangsta Granny comes another hilarious, action-packed and touching novel – the story of a little girl called Zoe. Things are not looking good for Zoe. Her stepmother Sheila is so lazy she gets Zoe to pick her nose for her. The school bully Tina Trotts makes her life a misery – mainly by flobbing on her head. And now the evil Burt from Burt’s Burgers is after her pet rat! And guess what he wants to do with it? The clue is in the title… From the author that is being called ‘a new Roald Dahl’, Ratburger is not to be missed!
Reacher's Rules: Life Lessons From Jack Reacher
by Lee Child Jack Reacher*Please note this is not a novel, but a companion book for Reacher fans* Reacher’s own rules for life are brought together in this irresistible collection of quotes, life lessons and wisdom from the man himself. As every Reacher fan knows, you don’t have to break the rules if you make the rules. If you want to survive in this world nothing else matters.Rule 1. When in doubt, drink coffee.Rule 2. Never volunteer for anything.Rule 3. Don’t break the furniture.Rule 4. Only one woman at a time.Rule 5. Show them what they’re messing with.‘I don’t want to put the world to rights, I just don’t like people who put the world to wrongs’‘Either you’ll walk out of here yourself, or you’ll be carried out in a bucket’‘I’m not scared of anybody… But I certainly preferred it when he was dead’If you’ve read the books, you’ll love this. If you haven’t read the books, what are you waiting for?
Really Weird Removals.com (Kelpies Ser.)
by Daniela SacerdotiShortlisted for the Scottish Children's Book Award 2013. Mischievous fairies? Smelly troll? Email the Really Weird Removals company! Luca and Valentina's Uncle Alistair runs a pest control business. But the Really Weird Removals Company catches supernatural creatures! When the children join Alistair's team they befriend a lonely ghost, rescue a stranded sea serpent, and trap a cat-eating troll. But the paranormal world is also packed with danger and secrets. There are kelpies, vampires and dragons. Will Luca and Valentina discover more than they can handle?
Red Dog/Blue Dog: When Pooches Get Political
by Chuck Sambuchino&“Totally worth the Milk-bones I traded for it.&” —Bo Obama&“So hilarious I peed on the rug.&” —Barney Bush Politics Goes to the Dogs Have you ever considered that man&’s best friend has political leanings just like we do? Red Dog / Blue Dog reveals that some tails wag to the left and others to the right! With 140 full-color photos of opinionated pooches accompanied by clever captions from the dogs themselves, this amusing book will add some much-needed levity to politics— whatever side of the political spectrum you are on.
Release Your Inner Old Fart
by Mark LeighIt doesn't take much to get an Old Fart complaining - whether it's about the price of electricity, reality TV, muesli, the metric system, self-checkouts or smoothies. It seems the whole world has it in for him and it's no wonder that he finds himself beginning most sentences with 'I remember when...' and ending them with, 'Those were the days.' Hilariously cynical and gloom-laden, this book contains diatribes, rants, anecdotes and advice for Old Farts everywhere - making life slightly more bearable in the constant struggle against the irritations of modern-day living.
Return to Castle Bay
by Phillipa AshleyBy the bestselling author of Summer at the Cornish Café, discover the perfect summer read.'Warm and funny and feel-good. The best sort of holiday read' Katie FfordeMiranda's taken great care to create a calm and ordered world for herself, and in her job as property manager of a spectacular island castle in Cornwall, she's had the castle running like clockwork. But this summer, its sexy owner returns to claim his birthright - and Miranda's careful life will never be the same again.Dark, handsome and with a rakish reputation, Jago St Merryn not only looks like a pirate but is intent on flogging the Mount to a soulless leisure corporation. Miranda faces the battle of her life as she tries to persuade him to change his mind. But if she's going to convince him, she'll have to face some secrets from her past that she'd much rather keep hidden away - and she might even have to risk opening up her heart...This lovely summer story is the perfect escape - take an armchair holiday to the spectacular Cornish countryside alongside a heroine who is determined to keep fighting for her castle of dreams.'Lovely books filled with warm and likeable characters' Jill Mansell'Perfect for an afternoon in the hammock' A Bookworm's World**Previously published as MIRANDA'S MOUNT
Return to Willow Lake: The Summer Hideaway Marrying Daisy Bellamy Return To Willow Lake (The Lakeshore Chronicles #9)
by Susan Wiggs#1 New York Times bestselling author Susan Wiggs brings readers home to Avalon, an idyllic town nestled on the tranquil shores of Willow Lake. There, one woman will rediscover her family and her dreams, and find a surprising new love…
Revelry: Revelry, Vanity, A Girl Called Summer, Party Nights, La Nights, New York Nights, London Nights, Ibiza Nights
by Lucy LordOne summer can change everything…
Roald Dahl's Marvellous Joke Book
by Roald DahlWhich famous writer goes best with a hot dog? Roll Dahl of course!Laugh yourself silly with Roald Dahl's Marvellous Joke Book, filled with over 400 hilarious jokes, limericks and riddles, illustrated by Quentin Blake. Based on Roald Dahl's most famous characters you will be chortling away with Matilda, Charlie, George, The BFG, James and many more! Roald Dahl was full of fun and mischief, and LOVED all kinds of jokes- the sillier the better, like chocolate-covered chickens to grizzly, grouchy grandmas. This side-splitting book includes his own 'knock-knock' jokes, keeping all practising jokesters amused for hours!
Rock Your Ugly Christmas Sweater
by Anne Marie Blackman Brian Clark HowardBased off the popular website of the same name, Rock Your Ugly Christmas Sweater celebrates ugly Christmas sweaters year-round and showcases hilarious photos of people and pets wearing some of the ugliest holiday sweaters ever. More colorful than visions of sugarplums and jollier than a sleigh full of inebriated elves, ugly Christmas sweaters are a global holiday tradition celebrated by all ages and walks of life. With more than 200 photos, humorous captions, and chapters like Vintage Sweater Fun, Classic Sweaters from the '80s and '90s, Winter Wonderland, and Best of the Best, this book is here to help you spread the holiday cheer and maybe get some new ideas for this year's ugly Christmas sweater party -- horrid fringe, creepy elves, gaudy snowmen, and light-up reindeer are just the beginning!
A Rogue by Any Other Name: Number 1 in series (Rules of Scoundrels #1)
by Sarah MacLean'Fabulous' Eloisa James'Smart, sexy, and always romantic' Julia Quinn'For a smart, witty and passionate historical romance, I recommend anything by Sarah MacLean' Lisa KleypasWhat a scoundrel wants, a scoundrel gets . . .A decade ago, the Marquess of Bourne was cast from society with nothing but his title. Now a partner in London's most exclusive gaming hell, the cold, ruthless Bourne will do whatever it takes to regain his inheritance - including marrying perfect, proper Lady Penelope Marbury.A broken engagement and years of disappointing courtships have left Penelope with little interest in a quiet, comfortable marriage. How lucky that her new husband has access to such unexplored pleasures. Bourne may be a prince of London's underworld, but he vows to keep Penelope untouched by its wickedness - a challenge indeed as the lady discovers her own desires, and her willingness to wager anything for them . . . even her heart.This is the first novel in the Regency romance Rules of Scoundrels series by New York Time bestselling author Sarah MacLean - perfect for fans of Lisa Kleypas and Eloisa James*Winner of the RITA Award for Best Historical Romance in 2013*Rules of Scoundrels series:A Rogue by Any Other NameOne Good Earl Deserves a LoverNo Good Duke Goes UnpunishedNever Judge a Lady By Her CoverPraise for Sarah MacLean:'Sarah MacLean has reignited the romance genre with a bolder edge' The New Yorker'Funny, smart, feminist and roastingly hot' BookRiot.com'Do yourself a favor and discover the compelling magic of Sarah MacLean' Amanda Quick'MacLean writes with an entirely unique blend of elegance and ferocity that bursts from every page' Entertainment Weekly'Great chemistry, intelligence and sparkling humor' RT Book Reviews
Romans (Sir Tony Robinson's Weird World of Wonders #6)
by Sir Tony RobinsonIn Sir Tony Robinson's Weird World of Wonders Romans, Sir Tony Robinson takes you on a headlong gallop through time, pointing out all the most important, funny, strange, amazing, entertaining and gory bits about the Romans! It's history, but not as we know it!Find out everything you ever needed to know in this brilliant, action-packed, fact-filled book including:- How to keep the gods happy- Why you should never ignore an omen- How to defeat an army who are riding elephants, and- How to spot a barbarianFor more funny history facts discover Sir Tony Robinson's Weird World of Wonders Egyptians.
The Runaway Actress
by Victoria ConnellyWhen the stresses of being an A-list actress get too much for her, Connie Gordon decides to escape to a tiny Scottish village. But little does she realise that whilst Lochnabrae might be quiet, it’s far from sleepy…
S*** My Kids Say
by Nick HarrisChildren have a unique way of looking at the world - they can be wonderfully innocent, or world-weary beyond their years. With entries such as 'Look, it's raining through that boy's trousers!', and 'Can we get something to eat? I'm vanished!', this book collects together the craziest and the funniest stuff that kids say in one hilarious volume - it's guaranteed to have you chuckling your socks off!
Sammy Feral's Diaries of Weird: Yeti Rescue (Sammy Feral's Diaries of Weird #2)
by Eleanor HawkenSammy Feral is a lucky boy. His family run a zoo and so he spends his spare time hanging out with orangutans, crocodiles and snakes. But his luck has just run out - his entire family has been infected with a werewolf virus! Now his mum, dad and sisters are howling at the moon, craving raw meat and, worst of all, trying to infect Sammy! Luckily, Donny and Red - a crack team who investigate animals that don't exist - are on hand to help. But with an evil professor determined to take over Feral Zoo and no known cure for the virus, things aren't looking good for Sammy!
Saving June (Mira Ink Ser.)
by Hannah Harrington‘With a powerful story, characters that truly come alive, and a romance worth swooning over, Saving June is a fresh, fun, and poignant book that I couldn't tear myself away from.’ – - Kody Keplinger, author of The DUFF
Scary Monsters and Super Creeps: In Search of the World's Most Hideous Beasts
by Dom JolyDom Joly sets off round the world, but this time he's not looking to holiday in a danger zone - he's monster hunting. Ever since he was given a copy of Arthur C. Clarke's Mysterious World for his ninth birthday Dom has been obsessed with the world of cryptozoology - monster hunting - and in Scary Monsters and Super Creeps he heads to six completely different destinations to investigate local monster sightings. He explores the Redwood Curtain in northern California in search of Sasquatch; in Canada he visits Lake Okanagan hoping to catch a glimpse of a thirty-foot snake-like creature called Ogopogo; and near Lake Tele in Congo he risks his life tracking the vegetarian sauropod Mokele-mbembe. Naturally he heads to Loch Ness - but for this hunt he has his family in tow; he treks across the Khumbu Valley in Nepal looking for Yeti; and in the hills above Hiroshima in Japan he enlists the help of a local man to find the Hibagon, a terribly smelly 'caveman ape'. Are the monsters all the product of fevered minds, or is there a sliver of truth somewhere in the madness? Either way, the search gives Dom an excuse to dive into six fascinating destinations on a gloriously nutty adventure. In typically hilarious and irreverent fashion, Dom explores the cultures that gave rise to these monster myths and ends up in some pretty hairy situations with people even stranger than the monsters they are hunting.
Scenes from Early Life: A Novel
by Philip HensherWinner of the Royal Society of Literature Ondaatje Prize, this is the new novel from the author of ‘King of the Badgers’ and the Man Booker-shortlisted ‘The Northern Clemency’.
School For Villains (Tumblewater Ser.)
by Bruno VincentI looked again at at the door and saw a message scrawled roughly in the mud of the wall above it, as though someone had used their whole hand to gouge it out: RIDLEY GARNET'S SCHOLE FUR VILLAINS. Everyone's favourite orphan-turned-storyteller Daniel Dorey is back - and heads below Tumblewater on his quest to find his sister. He unwittingly enrols in a very strange school, encountering a host of weird and wonderful characters - including for example Dr Bludger, who attacks corpses with an axe to give his students the opportunity to practise stitching. Other lessons are forgery, lock-picking, knife-wielding and still-life painting (with a twist). Will Daniel and his naughty schoolmates be able to put their grisly lessons into practice and help rescue his sister?