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Peckham Patter: The Complete Wit and Wisdom of Only Fools
by Dan SullivanFOREWORD BY SIR DAVID JASONAs Macbeth said to Hamlet in Midsummer Night's Dream, 'we've been done up like a couple of kippers - DelIn this pukka 42-carat gold-plated bargain, you have the wit and wisdom of Del Boy, Rodney, Albert, Boycie and Trigger at your disposal. Packed with all the funniest and most memorable lines from the classic British sit-com as it turns 40, this quote book is the crème de la menthe. Never be caught short again.Let's face it Del, most of your phrases come out of a Citroen manual - Rodney
Penguin Pandemonium: The Wild Beast (Awesome Animals)
by Jeanne WillisAn unforgettably funny, animal adventure story about a little bird with big dreams from award-winning author Jeanne Willis. One of the fantastic titles in the brand new Awesome Animals series - the funniest fiction, starring the wildest wildlife, from prize winning authors.
Penguin Pandemonium - The Rescue: The Rescue (Awesome Animals)
by Jeanne WillisThe second hilarious story about the irrepressible penguins of City Zoo, from award-winning author Jeanne Willis. One of the fantastic titles in the Awesome Animals series – the funniest fiction, starring the wildest wildlife, from prize winning authors.
People Who...
by wireless GIn this instantly relatable and hilariously true compendium of clever one-liners, a frustrated anthropologist identifies all the people who confound him with their continued, persistent existence. Whether it's the people who listen to cassette tapes for the hipster irony or the people who decide they need a new ringtone while riding the subway, People Who. . . is a laugh-out-loud look at those banes to our existence, and will have you nodding your head in agreement at the turn of every page.
Peppa Pig: The Biggest Muddy Puddle in the World Picture Book (Peppa Pig)
by LadybirdBased on the number one pre-school and BAFTA winning TV animation, Peppa Pig, this wonderful story book is perfect for reading at bedtime, playtime and over and over again!Once upon a time, there was a loveable, slightly bossy little piggy, named Peppa. She loved jumping up and down in muddy puddles. Peppa Pig and her little brother George don't mind rain, because rain means muddy puddles to jump in! But what happens when the rain is so heavy, torrential and even biblical? The result is a flood, and Granny and Grandpa Pig come to the rescue with their boat. And when the water disappears, it creates Peppa's dream come true- the world's biggest, muddiest puddle ever!This beautiful picture book is full of Peppa Pig humour and charm and will no doubt become a classic.
The Peppers and the International Magic Guys (The\peppers Ser.)
by Sian PattendenTake a peek behind the scenes at the wonderful world of THE PEPPERS… A show-stopping adventure starring an unbeatable double act – the Pepper twins, Monty & Esme.
Performing Live Comedy
by Chris RitchiePerforming Live Comedy is for anyone who has ever thought about getting up onstage and being funny or for those who have already started. It offers a breakdown of the process of live comedy and provides a basic toolbox for the student and aspirant comedian, covering all aspects of live comedy such as stand-up, music, double acts, ventriloquists and magicians. Gender, sexuality, ethnicity and disability are also covered in this book as well as ethical considerations on what we should or should not joke about. The book breaks down the entire process of live comedy from writing a simple one-liner to creating a complete act, from organizing an open spot at the local comedy club to getting into the Edinburgh Festival and running your own venue. Performing Live Comedy is full of advice and original interviews with comedians and writers currently involved in the comedy industry such as Shazia Merza, Henning Wehn, Ed Aczel, Paul Zerdin and Lucy Greaves.
Pete the Cat Saves Christmas: Je Dépanne Le Père Noël (Pete The Cat Ser.)
by Eric LitwinIt’s Christmas and time to deliver the presents… but Santa isn’t feeling well! Who can save not just the day, but Christmas? It’s all good… hilarious and loveable Pete the Cat is here!
Phantom Pirates (Frightfully Friendly Ghosties)
by Daren KingIt's holler-day time again, but things never run smoothly for our ghosties. Intead of a luxury cruise, the friends find themselves aboard a ship of phantom pirates - how frightful! And when the friendly ghosties discover that the pirates plan to invade a still-alive ship, they simply have to help - after all, it is the polite thing to do!
The Pick Up
by null Hannah DoyleA laugh-out-loud romcom in 2024 perfect for fans of Tessa Bailey and Elena Armas Committing to a fake romance is easy. It’s keeping it fake that’s the problem … 'Charming, funny, relatable' Sophie Cousens 'The perfect romcom. I’m still swooning, and I don’t swoon lightly' Lucy Vine 'A big, sunny hug of a book that I loved, and was so sad to finish' Cressida McLaughlin *** Sophie Rogers finds it easy to focus on the important things in life. Like her daughter, her job and her family. So when Joe, another single parent at school suggests they fake a romance to help them both out of a fix, she throws herself in. But then Sophie starts to look forward to seeing Joe. In fact, she’s thinking about his floppy hair, Irish accent and the way his lips felt when they grazed hers (her commitment to this is exceptional) more than their synced calendars and staged socials. And there is a reason the yummy mummies called him Hot Single Dad. Sophie Rogers isn't silly enough to fall in love with her fake boyfriend. Is she? 'A truly original and memorable love story full of hilarious characters, relatable moments and laugh-out-loud lines. An absolute joy!' Helly Acton Readers LOVE The Pick Up: ‘I love fake dating stories and this one nailed it’ ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 'Loved this fun and funny romcom with two single parents doing a fake dating scenario and catching real feelings!' ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 'I couldn't stop smiling!' ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 'The moment I picked the book up I was immersed, a book I intended to read for 20 mins before bed turned into a 3 hours session' ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Pip: Cat, Fen, Pip, Home Truths
by Freya NorthNEW on ebook for the first time with NEW author afterword.Do opposites really attract?
Planet of the Lawn Gnomes (Goosebumps Most Wanted Ser. #1)
by R. L. StineThe infamous, Most Wanted Goosebumps characters are out on the loose and they're coming after you! There is no place to hide. Nothing is safe! Jay Gardner is a mischievous kid who can't stay out of trouble. Unfortunately, Jay gets in so much trouble, his family is forced to move. But there's something odd about Jay's new town. Why does everyone have lawn gnomes in front of their homes? And why is everyone afraid to go outside at night? Jay is about to learn that mischief can lead to terror.
Pocket Kings: A Novel
by Ted HellerIn this dead-on satire of online obsessions, a novelist with writer’s block finds a new—and very lucrative—stream of income in a virtual world that appears to give him everything he lacks in the real world.When Frank Dixon, a frustrated writer who has seen his career crash and burn, decides to dabble in online poker, he discovers he has a knack for winning. In this newfound realm, populated by alluring characters—each of them elusive, mysterious, and glamorous—he becomes a smash success: popular, rich, and loved. Going by the name Chip Zero, he sees his fortunes and romantic liaisons thrive in cyberspace while he remains blind to the fact that his real life is sinking. His online success, however, does not come without complications, as he comes to realize that his “virtual” friends and lovers are, in fact, very real, and one rival player is not at all happy that Mr. Zero has taken all his money.Heller’s cautionary tale is continually surprising and startlingly real, a tour de force of satirical storytelling in the vein of Jonathan Tropper and Sam Lipsyte.
Pot Psychology's How to Be: Lowbrow Advice from High People
by Rich Juzwiak Tracie Egan MorrisseyDo you love stylish, sexy advice? Do you love marijuana? Get the best of both worlds with POT PSYCHOLOGY'S HOW TO BE, the hot, new, easy-to-use book from the creators of the Jezebel.com video advice sensation, Pot Psychology. We're Tracie and Rich, and our system guarantees results. We'll tell you how to be, and we'll do so quickly to cater to the attention spans of stoners and busy moms on the go.Want to be around hookers without the sticky, smelly mess? We can help. Need to know how to be about your underwhelming haircut or online relationships? We've got you covered. We've got advice for power bottoms, sideline hoes, bitches, female dogs, and so much more.You could spend hundreds of dollars on advice books, but only HOW TO BE spans the human experience in one personal, versatile volume. But wait, there's more! We also have 101 pictures of animals acting like people.If you are not completely satisfied with HOW TO BE, send it back!* Because ultimately, how to be is happy with your new life.*Refund not guaranteed
The Primal Urge: Containing The Interpreter, The Primal Urge, The Saliva Tree, The Impossible Star, Basis For Negotiation, Man In His Time
by Brian AldissHow would you like to have a disc set in the middle of your forehead which glowed pink whenever you felt sexually aroused?
Prime Minister Boris: And other things that never happened
by Duncan Brack Iain DaleHistory resting on a hair's breadth … a man dies rather than lives, an election is lost rather than won, one minister is appointed, another dismissed, a coalition is joined, or not. Enter a world of political counterfactuals, twenty-two examinations of things that never happened - but could have. In this book a collection of distinguished commentators, including journalists, academics, former MPs and special advisers, consider how things might have turned out differently throughout a century of political history - from Lloyd George and Keynes drowning at sea in 1916 right through to Boris Johnson becoming Prime Minister in 2016. Scholarly analyses of possibilities and causalities take their place beside fictional accounts of alternate political histories - and all are guaranteed to entertain and make you think.
The Public Confessions of a Middle-Aged Woman
by Sue TownsendThe Public Confessions of a Middle-Aged Woman (Aged 55¾) is a wonderful collection of non-fiction pieces, giving us an insight into Sue's hilarious worldSue Townsend is the much-loved comic author who brought us the bestselling Adrian Mole seriesEnter the world of Susan Lilian Townsend - sun-worshippers, work-shy writers, garden centre lovers and those in search of a good time are all welcome ...This sparkling collection of Sue Townsend's hilarious non-fiction covers everything from hosepipe bans to Spanish restaurants, from writer's block to slug warfare, from slob holidays to the banning of beige.These funny, perceptive and touching pieces reveal Sue, ourselves and the nation in an extraordinary new light. Sit back and chortle away as one of Britain's most popular and acclaimed writers takes a feather to your funny bone.The Public Confessions of a Middle-Aged Woman (Aged 55¾) is Sue Townsend's brilliantly witty collection on non-fiction pieces.'Anyone who loved The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole will enjoy this collection of witty and sharply observed jottings from the inimitable Sue Townsend. Great stuff' OK! 'Full of homely, hilarious asides on the absurdities of domestic existence ... What a fantastic advertisement for middle-age - it can't be bad if it's this funny' Heat 'A welcome addition to any bookshelf' Hello! 'It's as if Townsend has caught our idiosyncrasies on candid camera and is showing a rerun of all the silly clips ... the ideal dip-in-and-out book' Time OutSue Townsend is Britain's favourite comic author. Her hugely successful novels include eight Adrian Mole books, The Public Confessions of a Middle-Aged Woman (Aged 55¾), Number Ten, Ghost Children, The Queen and I, Queen Camilla and The Woman Who Went to Bed for a Year, all of which are highly acclaimed bestsellers. She has also written numerous well-received plays. She lives in Leicester, where she was born and grew up.
Q: A Love Story
by Evan ManderyIn a gripping tale of time travel and true love, a successful writer meets his future self, who advises him not to marry Q, the love of his life.
Quantum of Tweed: The Man With The Nissan Micra
by Conn IgguldenAn exclusive short story for World Book Day from one of our bestselling authors. This brilliant comic thriller will have you on the edge of your seat.
Rabid: Are You Crazy About Your Dog or Just Crazy?
by Pamela Redmond SatranDogs now dominate the $55-billion-a-year pet business in the US. Dog products, dog services, dog admiration - okay, let's call it dog worship - has become totally over the top, with doggie treadmills, dog swimming pools, caffeine-free doggie coffee, doggie massage, dog perfume, aromatherapy, hair coloring, and yes, doggie tattoos that would have seemed outlandish a generation ago when applied to your everyday household Rover.But Rover isn't called Rover anymore, he's called Rufus. Or Lola, according to the Tumblog Hipster Puppies. In fact, all Top Ten Dog Names are people names. And the canine Rufus doesn't stay home alone all day; he goes to Doggie Daycare. Eats brightly-frosted martini-shaped doggie treats. Wears designer tutus. Gets married on the beach. Has...Well, you'll see. With hilarious full-color photos throughout, Rabid holds a humorous mirror up to our dog-centered society, helping us laugh at our own behavior and at the even-more-insane antics of all those other dog people.
Rabid: Are You Crazy About Your Dog or Just Crazy?
by Pamela Redmond SatranDogs now dominate the $48 billion a year pet business, with nearly 40 percent of American households owning a total of 77.5 million dogs. Dog products, dog services, dog admiration - okay, let's call it dog worship - has become totally over the top. If you have a dog-obsessed friend or relative, you've seen the phenomenon. Or maybe you're a dog owner and lover, and have found yourself buying, doing, craving, needing dog-related items (doggie treadmills, dog swimming pools, caffeine-free doggie java) and services (doggie massage, dog perfume, aromatherapy, hair coloring, and yes, doggie tattoos) that would have seemed outlandish a generation ago when applied to your everyday household Rover.But Rover isn't called Rover anymore, he's called Rufus. Or Lola, according to the Tumblog Hipster Puppies. In fact, all Top Ten Dog Names are people names. And the canine Rufus doesn't stay home alone all day; he goes to Doggie Daycare. Eats brightly-frosted martini-shaped doggie treats. Wears designer tutus. Gets married on the beach. Has...Well, you'll see. Rabid is a catalog of how over-the-top our dog obsession had become. It's a book aimed not only at dog skeptics but at dog lovers and the people who love them. Funny, fun, yet holding a mirror up to our dog-centered society, Rabid will help us laugh at our own behavior and at the even-more-insane antics of all those other dog people. And it will give some solace to the 60 percent of us who've so far evaded America's dog mania. Photos throughout.
Raccoon Rampage: The Raid (Awesome Animals)
by Andrew CopeFrom the award-winning author of the Spy Dog series comes a wildly funny tale in HarperCollins’ Awesome Animals series – the funniest fiction, starring the wildest of wildlife from leading authors.
Raccoon Rampage - The Raid: The Raid (Awesome Animals)
by Andrew CopeFrom the award-winning author of the Spy Dog series comes a wildly funny tale in HarperCollins’ Awesome Animals series – the funniest fiction, starring the wildest of wildlife from leading authors.
Rachel's Holiday: A Hay Festival and The Poole VOTE 100 BOOKS for Women Selection
by Marian KeyesDeliciously dark and fantastically funny, Rachel's Holiday is the story of a young woman living life rather too well until the day she takes it too far endangering everything she cares about . . . 'They said I was a drug addict. But my occasional drug use was strictly recreational. And, hey, surely drug addicts are skinny?'Rachel is living it up in New York City, spending her nights talking her way into glamorous parties before heading home in the early hours to her hot boyfriend Luke.Then her sensible older sister shows up and even though it seems like a bad joke, she finds herself in actual rehab.It's there that she's supposed to kick her non-existent drug habit - and to get over losing Luke. Luke's a fox; he's also strong and kind, but he has had more than he can take of Rachel. None of this was part of her plan and saying goodbye to fun will be hard.But not as hard as losing the man that, too late, she believes might be the love of her life . . .'Gloriously funny' Sunday Times'A born storyteller' Independent on Sunday'The voice of a generation' Daily Mirror
Ratburger: The Boy In The Dress/mr Stink/billionaire Boy/gangsta Granny/ratburger
by null David WalliamsThe fifth screamingly funny novel from David Walliams, number one bestseller and fastest growing children’s author in the country. Hot on the heels of bestselling Gangsta Granny comes another hilarious, action-packed and touching novel – the story of a little girl called Zoe. Things are not looking good for Zoe. Her stepmother Sheila is so lazy she gets Zoe to pick her nose for her. The school bully Tina Trotts makes her life a misery – mainly by flobbing on her head. And now the evil Burt from Burt’s Burgers is after her pet rat! And guess what he wants to do with it? The clue is in the title… From the author that is being called ‘a new Roald Dahl’, Ratburger is not to be missed!