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Dirty Beasts (Altea Mascota Ser.)
by Roald Dahl Quentin BlakeDirty Beasts is a collection of hilarious animal rhymes from the World's NUMBER ONE Storyteller!With amazing full-colour illustrations by Quentin Blake.A collection of (mainly) grisly beasts out for human blood, ranging from Gocky-Wock the crocodile to Sting-A-Ling the scorpion. Described in verse with all Dahl's usual gusto and illustrated in suitably lurid style by Quentin Blake.'A true genius . . . Roald Dahl is my hero' - David Walliams Exciting, bold and instantly recognisable with Quentin Blake's inimitable artwork.Look out for the whole collection of wondercrump Roald Dahl books!
Songs and Verse
by Roald DahlThink of your favourite Roald Dahl moment and surely a song or verse cannot be far away...SONGS AND VERSE has seven sections bursting with rhymes about monsters, magical creatures, gruesome children, ghastly adults as well as a few unusual surprises. From the strange and scrumptious dishes enjoyed by James's Centipede to George and his marvellous medicine, and from greedy Augustus Gloop to the Giraffe and the Pelly and Me there are many classics here together with some previously unpublished treats. With a foreword and opening illustrations by Quentin Blake, and illustrations throughout from other award-winning artists such as Babette Cole, Lauren Child, Chris Riddell, Alel Scheffler and Tony Ross, you will find a touch of magic on every page.
Roller Girl
by Victoria JamiesonAstrid has always done everything with her best friend Nicole. So when Astrid falls in love with roller derby and signs up for a summer camp, she's sure Nicole will be right by her side - until Nicole signs up for ballet camp instead, with Astrid's biggest rival. So begins the hardest summer of Astrid's life, as she struggles to stay on her skates, to learn who she is without Nicole . . . and to find out what it takes to be a strong, tough, awesome roller girl.
Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Getaway (Diary of a Wimpy Kid)
by Jeff KinneyBook 12 is the best yet in the brilliant, bestselling Diary of a Wimpy Kid series!Greg Heffley and his family are getting out of town. With the cold weather setting in and the stress of the Christmas holiday approaching, the Heffleys decide to escape to a tropical island resort for some much-needed rest and relaxation. A few days in paradise should do wonders for Greg and his frazzled family.But the Heffleys soon discover that paradise isn't everything it's cracked up to be. Sun-poisoning, stomach troubles and venomous creatures all threaten to ruin the family's vacation.Can their trip be saved, or will this island getaway end in disaster?Whether a loyal fan already or new to the Wimpy Kid books, THE GETAWAY is the perfect book for young readers this Christmas. With engaging writing, hilarious illustrations on every page and an action-packed holiday-based plot, THE GETAWAY is a winner.Praise for Jeff Kinney:'The world has gone crazy for Jeff Kinney's Diary of a Wimpy Kid' - Sun'Kinney is right up there with J K Rowling as one of the bestselling children's authors on the planet' - Independent'The most hotly anticipated children's book of the year is here - Diary of a Wimpy Kid' - Big Issue'Hilarious' - Telegraph
This Is Not A Bedtime Story
by Fred Blunt Will MabbittA brilliant new picture book from rising stars Will Mabbitt and Fred Blunt.Sophie doesn't want a story time filled with cute kittens and birthday parties, she wants rocket-launching helicopters and a giant robot dinosaur! Clever, funny and heart-racingly exciting, this is a book to inspire and delight every little girl and boy.Bedtime will never be the same again.
Revolting Rhymers: Competition Winners
by Quentin BlakeThe Winning Entries of the most REVOLTING Poetry Competition!To celebrate the BBC's new two-part animation of Roald Dahl's Revolting Rhymes, the Roald Dahl Literary Estate launched a poetry competition with a twist, asking chiddlers far and wide to submit their most revolting - and humorous rhymes. We were inundated with thousands of disgusterous entries! To discover our winners, we waded through burps, farts and rotten eggs; bogies, vile stew and goo to find the funniest and most revolting specimens. This eBook contains the crème de la phlegm-hand picked by children's author, songwriter and McFly frontman, Tom Fletcher, and Wales's Children's Poet Laureate, Anni Llyn. A huge thank you to our revolting partners Puffin Books, the National Literacy Trust, Literature Wales, Magic Light, and the Roald Dahl Museum and Story Centre for all their help and support!
My Brother's Famous Bottom Makes a Splash! (My Brother's Famous Bottom)
by Jeremy StrongA new hilarious adventure in the My Brother's Famous Bottom series by King of Comedy, Jeremy Strong.Nicholas and his family are off on holiday to Turkey! But with Cheese and Tomato causing chaos with stray tortoises, Dad having to be rescued by the lifeguard, and Mum setting off the hotel sprinkler system with her belly-dancing routine, rest and relaxation are not on the cards!
I Can Only Draw Worms
by Will MabbittThis book is about worms. I can only draw worms.You might think worms are boring - but you'd be wrong. These worms have INCREDIBLE adventures!I can't draw those bits, though, so you'll have to imagine them.A hilarious and superbly silly book that will have children in stitches and begging for more.
Colin Furze: This Book Isn't Safe!
by Steve May Colin FurzeYouTuber Colin Furze is on a mission to inspire a new generation of budding inventors to be creative and make things! This Book Isn't Safe! contains ten awesome inventions for girls, boys and parents everywhere to make at home with a basic tool kit. Ever wondered how to clean a potato with a drill? Or how to make a raft out of milk cartons? Or how to style your hair with a hoover? These are just some of the inventions Colin is making especially for his debut book. With over four million YouTube subscribers already hooked to his inventions channel, This Book Isn't Safe! will also give fans a unique behind-the-scenes look at Colin and all his greatest inventions such as the homemade hoverbike, a Star Wars AT-AT and the world's fastest toilet, to name but a few, and give you exclusive secrets and tips from his bunker and shed.
The Wimpy Kid Movie Diary: The Next Chapter (Diary Of A Wimpy Kid Ser.)
by Jeff KinneyGo on a movie-making journey of epic proportions in The Wimpy Kid Movie Diary: The Next ChapterMaking a movie is a lot like going on a road trip. There are twists and turns and lots of surprises along the way.Hit the road with author and illustrator Jeff Kinney and get a behind-the-scenes look at the making of the latest 20th Century Fox movie, Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul. In cinemas from the 20th May.Find out what it takes to film a flock of seagulls invading a mini-van. Learn about a robot pig and an animatronic three-year-old. And discover everything that goes into making a feature film. Complete with exclusive set photos, storyboards and original cartoons by Jeff Kinney. The Wimpy Kid Movie Diary: The Next Chapter is the perfect book for anyone who's ever wondered how a movie gets made and an ideal companion to the bestselling series. But buckle up: You're in for a wild ride.
The Vicar of Nibbleswicke (Bestseller Collection Ser.)
by Roald Dahl Quentin BlakeThe Reverend Lee is suffering from a rare and acutely embarrassing condition: Back-to-Front Dyslexia. It affects only his speech, and he doesn't realize he's doing it, but the parishioners of Nibbleswicke are shocked and confused by his seemingly outrageous comments. At last a cure is found and the mild-mannered vicar can resume normal service. Or at least as normal as is possible for a man who must walk backwards to be sure of talking forwards!A highly comic tale in the best Dahl tradition of craziness, written for the benefit of the Dyslexia Institute.
Meg and the Romans
by Jan PienkowskiMeg and Mog meet a new friend - a Roman who is in need of help! But will Meg's spell get him to London? Find out in this colourful new adventure and find out more about what Romans were really like...The Meg and Mog books have been entertaining children for nearly forty-five years; with their vibrant and unique artwork - they are perfect for sharing together, reading alone, and exploring the colours, shapes and characters in the pictures.
80: Poems by Roger McGough
by Roger McGoughThere are eighty of Roger McGough's favourite poems in this hugely enjoyable collection, gathered together into a new volume to celebrate Roger's 80th birthday! Sometimes funny, sometimes sad, but always inventive, the enormous variety of poems from this hugely popular poet will never cease to amaze and delight children of all ages.
My Magical Life: Tom Fletcher Book Club Title 2018
by Zach King Beverly ArceSelected as a title in Tom Fletcher's Book Club 2018! -------------A debut series from the mega-talented Zach King, full of laughs, zany action and more than a hint of magic.Eleven-year-old Zach has magical powers, just like everyone in his family, but he's having trouble harnessing his abilities... Obviously being magical, but not being able to use his abilities isn't exactly great for ZachSo, his parents decide he needs to be around real people. No more home schooling- it's time to go to the scary world of secondary school! But Zach can't resist a bit of magic... A simple spell ends with him and his best friend stuck in a vending machine. Someone filmed it and by the next day he's gone viral on YouTube, getting the attention of Rachel, the prettiest girl at school. With everyone wondering how Zach does his tricks, and with head mean girl Trisha plotting to bring him down, Zach's got his work cut out if he's going to survive year 7 and keep his dreams of becoming a master magician intact.Get the app! With the My Magical Life app, you can bring the book to life in front of your eyes!
The Hodgeheg
by Dick King-SmithThe Hodgeheg by Dick King-Smith is a much-loved classic! Max, the hedgehogwho becomes a hodgeheg,who becomes a hero!Max's family dreams of reaching the Park. But no one has ever found a safe way of crossing the very busy road. Young Max, who is brighter than the average hedgehog, is determined to solve the problem.'A nicely told, darkly humorous story about how hedgehogs can avoid getting squashed on the road' - Guardian 'A huge favourite' - ObserverDick King-Smith served in the Grenadier Guards during the Second World War, and afterwards spent twenty years as a farmer in Gloucestershire, the country of his birth. Many of his stories are inspired by his farming experiences. He wrote a great number of children's books, including The Sheep-Pig (winner of the Guardian Award and filmed as Babe), Harry's Mad, Noah's Brother, The Queen's Nose, Martin's Mice, Ace, The Cuckoo Child and Harriet's Hare (winner of the Children's Book Award in 1995). In 2009 he was made an OBE for services to children's literature. Dick King-Smith died in 2011 at the age of eighty-eight.
The Futurist Cookbook
by Filippo Tommaso Marinetti Suzanne Brill Lesley ChamberlainBoth madcap cookbook and manifesto on Futurism, Marinetti's exuberant and entertaining book has been described as one of 'the best artistic jokes of the century'No other cultural force except the early twentieth-century avant-garde movement Futurism has produced a provocative work about art disguised as an easy-to-read cookbook. Part manifesto, part artistic joke, Fillippo Marinetti's The Futurist Cookbook is a collection of recipes, experiments, declamations and allegorical tales. Here are recipes for ice cream on the moon; candied atmospheric electricities; nocturnal love feasts; sculpted meats. Marinetti also sets out his argument for abolishing pasta as ill-suited to modernity, and advocates a style of cuisine that will increase creativity. Although at times betraying its author's nationalistic sympathies, The Futurist Cookbook is funny, provocative, whimsical, disdainful of sluggish traditions and delighted by the velocity and promise of modernity.Filippo Tommaso Marinetti was born in 1876 to Italian parents and grew up in Alexandria, Egypt, where he was nearly expelled from his Jesuit school for championing scandalous literature. He then studied in Paris and obtained a law degree in Italy before turning to literature. In 1909 he wrote the infamous Futurist Manifesto, which championed violence, speed and war, and proclaimed the unity of art and life. Marinetti's life was fraught with controversy: he fought a duel with a hostile critic, was subject to an obscenity trial, and was a staunch supporter of Italian Fascism. Alongside his literary activities, he was a war correspondent during the Italo-Turkish War and served on the Eastern Front in World War II, despite being in his sixties. He died in 1944.'A paean to sensual freedom, optimism and childlike, amoral innocence ... it has only once been answered, by Aldous Huxley's Brave New World' Lesley Chamberlain
Three Men in a Boat and Three Men on the Bummel: (100+ Works) Includes Three Men In A Boat, Idle Thoughts Of An Idle Fellow, Three Men On The Bummel And More (World's Classics)
by Jerome K. Jerome Jeremy LewisMartyrs to hypochondria and general seediness, J. and his friends George and Harris decide that a jaunt up the Thames would suit them to a 'T'. But when they set off, they can hardly predict the troubles that lie ahead with tow-ropes, unreliable weather-forecasts and tins of pineapple chunks - not to mention the devastation left in the wake of J.'s small fox-terrier Montmorency. Three Men in a Boat was an instant success when it appeared in 1889, and proved so popular that Jerome reunited his now older - but not necessarily wiser - heroes in Three Men on the Bummel, for a picaresque bicycle tour of Germany. With their benign escapism, authorial discursions and wonderful evocation of the late-Victorian 'clerking classes', both novels hilariously capture the spirit of their age.
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (Penguin Modern Classics Series)
by James ThurberThe very best of James Thurber's hilarious short stories and essays, to tie-in with the major new film starring Ben Stiller and Kristen Wiig. Walter Mitty is an ordinary man living an ordinary life. But he has dreams - vivid, extraordinary day dreams - in which the life he leads is one of excitement and even adventure, in which he - a weary, put upon middle-aged man - is the hero of his own story. A man can dream, can't he?The Secret Life of Walter Mitty is just one of the brilliant humorous and witty stories written by James Thurber and collected here.James Thurber was born in 1894 at Columbus, Ohio, where, as he once said, so many awful things happened to him. After university (Ohio State) he worked at the American Embassy in Paris from 1918 to 1920, and then turned to journalism. From 1927 onwards he was on the staff of the New Yorker, and first published much of his work in it. He died in New York in 1961, and is today recognised as one of America's greatest twentieth-century humourists.
The Thurber Carnival (Penguin Modern Classics Series)
by James ThurberThe hilarious writing of James Thurber, author of 'The Secret Life of Walter Mitty', collected in this classic anthology.This collection brings together the best of James Thurber's brilliantly funny, eccentric and anarchic writings. It includes his most famous work, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, in which an ordinary man's fantasies have a more powerful hold on him than reality, as well as essays, poetry and cartoons gathered from all of Thurber's collections. Making fun of his own weaknesses and those of other people (and dogs) - the English teacher who looked only at figures of speech, the Airedale who refused to include him in the family, the botany lecturer who despaired of him totally - James Thurber is a true original, whose off-beat imagination shows us everyday life from a different angle.James Thurber was born in 1894 at Columbus, Ohio, where, as he once said, so many awful things happened to him. After university (Ohio State) he worked at the American Embassy in Paris from 1918 to 1920, and then turned to journalism. From 1927 onwards he was on the staff of the New Yorker, and first published much of his work in it. He died in New York in 1961, and is today recognised as one of America's greatest twentieth-century humourists.'One of the absolutely essential books of our time' Saturday Review of Literature'One of the great humorists' Sunday Times
A Modest Proposal: For Preventing The Children Of Poor People In Ireland, From Being A Burden On Their Parents Or Country, And For Making Them Beneficial To The Publick (Penguin Little Black Classics)
by Jonathan Swift'... a most delicious, nourishing, and wholesome food...'Swift's devastating short satire on how to solve a famineIntroducing Little Black Classics: 80 books for Penguin's 80th birthday. Little Black Classics celebrate the huge range and diversity of Penguin Classics, with books from around the world and across many centuries. They take us from a balloon ride over Victorian London to a garden of blossom in Japan, from Tierra del Fuego to 16th century California and the Russian steppe. Here are stories lyrical and savage; poems epic and intimate; essays satirical and inspirational; and ideas that have shaped the lives of millions.Jonathan Swift (1667-1745). Swift's works available in Penguin Classics are Gulliver's Travels and A Modest Proposal and Other Writings.
A Handful of Dust (Penguin Modern Classics)
by Evelyn WaughEvelyn Waugh's celebrated tale of decadence and social disintegration, with an introduction by Philip EadeAfter seven years of marriage, the beautiful Lady Brenda Last is bored with life at Hetton Abbey, the Gothic mansion that is the pride and joy of her husband, Tony. She drifts into an affair with the shallow socialite John Beaver and forsakes Tony for the Belgravia set. Brilliantly combining tragedy, comedy and savage irony, A Handful of Dust captures the irresponsible mood of the 'crazy and sterile generation' between the wars. This breakdown of the Last marriage is a painful, comic re-working of Waugh's own divorce, and a symbol of the disintegration of society.'One of the twentieth century's most chilling and bitter novels; and one of its best'Nicholas Lezard, Guardian'One of the most distinguished novels of the century'Frank Kermode'This is a masterpiece of stylish satire, and is funny, too ... a marvellous book'John Banville, Irish Times
The Seven Words You Can't Say on Television
by Steven PinkerWhy do so many swear words involve sex, bodily functions and religion? Why are some words rude and others aren't? Why can launching into expletives be so shocking - and sometimes so amusing?Steven Pinker takes us on a fascinating and funny journey through the world of profanities, taken from his bestselling The Stuff of Thought, to show us why we swear (whatever our language or culture), how taboos change and how we use obscenities in different ways. You'll discover that in Québecois French the expression 'Tabernacle' is outrageous, that the Middle Ages were littered with four-letter words, that 'scumbag' has a very unsavoury origin and that in a certain Aboriginal language every word is filthy when spoken in front of your mother-in-law. Covering everything from free speech to Tourette's, from pottymouthed celebrities to poetry, this book reveals what swearing tells us about how our minds work. (It's also a bloody good read).
Mr S and the Secrets of Andorra's Box
by Ross O'Carroll-KellyRoss O'Carroll-Kelly is broke and out of love. His wife has gone to America, taking his daughter with him; his mother has become a celebrity chef on daytime television, with a particular skill for handling phallic ingredients; and his father continues to languish in Mountjoy Jail.To cap it all, Immaculata, a Nigerian girl whom his wife, Sorcha, has been sponsoring by direct debit for fifteen years, has turned up on his doorstep. Things couldn’t get worse.But the long road back begins high in the Pyrenees, in the tax haven of Andorra, where Ross must spread the Gospel of rugby to the strange, primitive natives who have only ever heard of soccer, skiing and duty free shopping. There he meets Conchita, a beautiful, sultry psychoanalyst, who persuades him to look inwards and find out what it is that makes him tick. Sorry, thick.
Is This Some Kind of Joke?
by Hugleikur DagssonHugleikur Dagsson is the most famous cartoonist in Iceland.Iceland is very cold, very bleak and very expensive. The only things to do there are drink and kill whales. Dagsson’s last book – Is This Supposed To Be Funny? – was a cult international bestseller. He hopes you likes this one. Otherwise he’ll have to kill some whales
A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian (Oberon Modern Plays Ser.)
by Marina LewyckaWINNER OF THE BOLLINGER EVERYMAN PRIZE FOR COMIC FICTION WINNER OF THE SAGA AWARD FOR WIT 2005SHORTLISTED FOR THE ORANGE PRIZE FOR FICTION LONGLISTED FOR THE BOOKER PRIZE 2005 'Two years after my mother died, my father fell in love with a glamorous blonde Ukrainian divorcée. He was eighty-four and she was thirty-six. She exploded into our lives like a fluffy pink grenade, churning up the murky water, bringing to the surface a sludge of sloughed-off memories, giving the family ghosts a kick up the backside.' Sisters Vera and Nadezhda must aside a lifetime of feuding to save their émigré engineer father from voluptuous gold-digger Valentina. With her proclivity for green satin underwear and boil-in-the-bag cuisine, she will stop at nothing in her pursuit of Western wealth. But the sisters' campaign to oust Valentina unearths family secrets, uncovers fifty years of Europe's darkest history and sends them back to roots they'd much rather forget . . .A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian is bestselling author Marina Lewycka's hilarious and award winning debut novel. 'It's rare to find a first novel that gets so much right . . . Lewycka is a seriously talented comic writer' Time Out 'Hugely enjoyable...yields a golden harvest of family truths' Daily Telegraph 'Delightful, funny, touching' Spectator Bestselling author Marina Lewkyca has received great critical acclaim since the publication of her hilarious first novel A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian in 2005, which was the winner of the Bollinger Everyman Prize for Comic Fiction 2005, winner of the Saga Award for Wit 2005, shortlisted for the Orange Prize for Fiction 2005 and longlisted for the Booker prize 2005. Her other humorous novels Two Caravans (published as Strawberry Fields in the USA and Canada), We Are All Made of Glue and Various Pets Alive and Dead are also available from Penguin.